With apologies to the Disney Conglomerate-I read a delightful post on another blog, “Allisms.”
I discovered this blog today and want to share my favorite post (link below). It rang true because of the many status updates I read written by single people who are not comfortable with their own company, or who have subscribed to a movie company’s version of how true love looks. Here’s a secret: this version sells DVDs, but it is not what true love looks like.
I still see, and shockingly I see it often posted by women in the generation younger than mine, status updates that read like “Someday my Prince will Come!” Waiting for the one, waiting on the phone, waiting to get a man so life can truly begin. Calling some guy “the hubby” after knowing him a week.
Girls, stop it. You don’t need to validate yourself by whether you’re one half of a couple. PLEASE don’t validate yourself by whether you’re one half of a couple. It took much of my generation until we reached our 30s to outgrow that self-esteem busting habit, and the generation older than mine has for the most part never moved past the notion that it’s panic time if you don’t “have a man.”
Boys, don’t think you’re just there to save a girl from the perils of being single; it’s condescending, insulting and not so attractive. And unnecessary. You need to contribute much more than your handsome presence, please. You also need to expect more from your girl than helpless adoration under that tiara. Maybe you could use a save once in a while; that White Knight biz must get tiring after a while.
I am not bashing coupledom. If you find love and partnership, that is a wonderful thing. I just hate to see young women:
1) Waiting to be “rescued” from…what, exactly?
2) Thinking that ‘getting the ring’ is be-all and end-all and all that matters. And
2a) Teaching their daughters to think that way.
3) Settling for “Prince” who’s, well, not one, just because he’s “there.”
4) Spending precious time wishing and hoping for, lamenting the lack of, or fighting for a man–time that could be spent living, learning, reading, traveling, discovering….you get the idea.
Stop wishing on a star. You already are a star. You don’t need to play any role other than who you are–not if you want an authentic and meaningful journey. “Draw yourself” as you are–not as the Disney animators drew fictional characters.
Check it out: